Waiting is never easy, but this has really been difficult. Once we put in to adopt "Tammy" we found out that we could not see her anymore. No more overnight visits or trips to the lake or even out to dinner. We were told that we should not tell her that we are trying to adopt her either. So she doesn't know why we can't see her. I know she must wonder what is going on. I can't help but think what was going through Sarah's mind; she must have been afraid and concerned to think of carrying and birthing a child, but she did it. She had faith and she trusted the Lord's plan. Noah had never seen rain, but that didn't stop him from buiding the Ark. By faith . . .
Last week Olivia and I talked about cleaning out the closet in "Tammy's" room and fixing things up. There are many toys stored in there that she'd enjoy playing with as a 10 year old, but many would seem like baby toys. We thought we'd box up the baby toys and put them in the attic. I had to take Olivia to the doctor on Wednesday and it just so happened that the X-ray tech had several boxes that were in her way. As she and I made small talk about cleaning out she insisted I take her extra boxes for our project. What a blessing! Olivia felt sure that was a sign that yes, we should clean out the closet and get that room more age appropriate for "Tammy". While we were working in her room, a friend posted a picture of a really cute bedroom suit for sale on facebook. Even though our foster room had a nice twin bed and furniture, the bed for sale was a double bed and looked more like a "big girl" bedroom group. We were able to buy it and set it up this weekend. Olivia made "Tammy" a personalized memory board with her monogram and pictures of all of us. The room looks great !!! By faith . . .
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We don't know if she'll ever get to come home and see this room. We don't know if we'll be the chosen family. What we do know is that, by faith, we are preparing for her return. We asked her foster mom last week to find out what color room she'd like if she could pick any color room and she said baby blue. Baby blue is the color of the room we are preparing for her. It is the room in our home that used to be her room. It's the room she remembers, and the room she wants to return to.
We don't know if the adoptions selection committee will choose us, but by faith we are ready. We have gotten our adoptions license, we have prayed, we have asked others to pray and now all we can do is wait. Jesus knows the plan He has for her life and our lives. We have to trust His plan. Please pray with us as we continue to wait. Pray that all of our hearts will be seeking the Lord's will. Pray for "Tammy" as she must be filled with so much uncertainty and fear as to her unknown future. Pray that the Lord will give her peace and joy and understanding. We love her and we'd like nothing more than to bring her home. We are the first family she came to after leaving the only home she ever knew. We want to be her forever home. We love her and we covet your prayers for all of us.
From the heart of a hopeful mom.