A new season of my life.

Over the summer Olivia and I went through biblical counseling to help us overcome our anxiety and fears.  It was a wonderful time together with our bible and counselor.  We learned that fear is not of God and now 2 Timothy 1:7 is one of my most treasured bible verses.  It says, " For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." When you go through life worrying about the "what if's" you don't really enjoy much.  You find yourself saying no to invitations that could be fun and worthwhile.  You miss out on many joys.  Praise the Lord that is NOT the case with either of us anymore.  Through the word of God we have been set free !!!  Our counselor told us that Satan was not going to be happy about this because for years he has been putting chains on us (they are now removed by the power of the holy spirit).  She assured us that Satan would attack us and she said he would attack our health.  She couldn't have been more correct.  Olivia has had sinus allergy issues and missed school due to sickness.  I've been struck deaf in my left ear.   I have my 3rd and final steroid shot in my ear this week before an MRI is ordered.  I am an active person who loves caring for my family and doing for others.  This ear issue has slowed me down.  I drove out to Target last week and while sitting in the parking lot Satan kept whispering that I shouldn't go inside.  He told me that I'd just get dizzy and that I needed to go back home.  I knew that wasn't from the Lord so I pulled out my Victory journal from counseling and I read all of the verses that helped before. I prayed and asked the Lord for strength.  Do you know when I got out of the car a good friend was there and she asked how my ear and dizziness was?  She wanted to know if I was ok  and if I needed her.  Coincident? No way.  The Lord put her there to encourage me and to remind me that the Lord is always going to meet my needs ( and yours for that matter, if you will only trust Him).  I shopped and bought what I needed.  I didn't have any dizzy spells :-) I had another victory to write in my victory journal!  Right now I am taking life one moment at the time.  Honestly, I am unsure of what my future holds, but knowing who holds my future keeps me going.  When you lose your hearing in one ear, the other ear tries so hard to overcompensate.  Teaching 5 year old children is a joy, but the sounds my one ear takes in when all of the kids get excited and talk is tough.  I love to go to church, but music is not the same.  Sunday I had to sit out while the singing was going on because of all of the different sounds. Thankfully I can listen to the pastor ( or one person).  I wonder if Charles Billingsley's concert this Sunday evening will be my last??? I'm curious how my ear will do with one singer verses a choir.  I think acappella will sound good :) 

So this is me sharing and venting I guess. I'd be amiss if I forgot to share with you about making the treat bags with scripture to give out on Halloween.  Every year our family fills candy bags and attaches the word of God.  This year I printed a prayer for the child on one side of the paper and the plan of salvation on the other side.  We all will pray over the bagged candy and we'll know that each child who leaves our door on Halloween will be carrying the word of God with them.  If you'd like a copy of what I typed I'll be glad to send it to you. 

Well that's all that's on my heart right now. Actually Little One is still on my heart, but I've been so occupied with doctor appointments that the Lord has healed the hurt of her being gone.  I still keep in touch with her new foster family and she is doing great !!

Go be a blessing ...

Victory in Jesus !!

There is victory in Jesus.  Last Thursday we sat through court listening to witnesses and accounts of what happened to our precious Little One.  The judge took all the evidence and testimonies and said he'd give us a verdict the next day.  Friday morning we prepared our hearts to hear what he would say.  Praise the Lord he ruled in favor of the child!!! He saw that abuse did take place and he felt it was in her best interest to remain in DSS custody (so she is still with us).  We are very happy for her and this victory.  We thank you all for your prayers, calls, texts, emails and words of encouragement.  They were all felt. 

Ephesians 3:14-21

King James Version (KJV)

¹⁴ For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
¹⁵ Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named,
¹⁶ That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man;
¹⁷ That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,
¹⁸ May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;
¹⁹ And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fullness of God.
²⁰ Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
²¹ Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.

A journey of faith

Wow, it has been 2 months to the day since I've blogged ... boy do I have some things to share with you.   On  March 26, 2011 while at the beach for our last family vacation before our foster child was to return to her mother "Little One" prayed and asked Jesus into her tender heart.  It was a glorious day. She had been asking questions and was ready to give her heart to the Lord.  Fast forward to March 26, 2012 ... I had just returned from visiting my grandmother at the nursing home and sat down to check my facebook.  As the feeds came through one from channel 7 news rocked my world.  There was a picture of our first foster child's mother (her mug shot) and the title read; "Mother chased daughter with a claw hammer".  Don't you know my heart sank? I began to shake and felt sick.  I called Chris who always calms me and asked him to call DSS.  Within 20 minutes a representative from DSS called me and I found out Little One was safe and ok.  That evening we picked up Little One from the Children's shelter and she has been with us since.  What a difference one year can make. I am happy to report "Little One" is healthy, happy and doing great. There have been two court hearings which were both continued( moved 30 days or more) with no actions taken. Next Thursday, Sept. 6th is our next court date.  Due to privacy I can't really share information with you, but I would ask that you join me to pray specifically, that the Lord's will for where Little One should live be revealed to all of us.  Some family members have come forward and would like to have her come live with them, so that is a possibility.  Our family only wants the best for her and her future.  This has been a long journey and after court I will share more from my heart and what the Lord has taught me throughout this process.  Right now I ask for prayers for Little One.  Thanks.

My two cents on Magic Mike

There is nothing "magic" about Magic Mike. It's a well thought out Hollywood ploy... "sex sells". Galatians 5:16, "I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh." I won't be taken in by satans lies. My love and respect for my husband and daughters and the example I want them to see in my life keeps me away from such a movie. Matthew 19:5-6 "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” I'm not going to let Hollywood separate me from my husband. What good can come from me looking at half dressed men dancing? No good, none at all. I don't want my eyes to see what isn't mine. My heart belongs to Jesus and Chris. Yeah, yeah I can hear the world saying, "but it's just a movie". No it's not just a movie and if you believe that lie then you are not being honest with yourself. The word of God clearly tells us in 1 John 2:16, "For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world." I choose to avoid it because 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 "Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s." I am God's girl and I want to glorify Him in all I do. No I am not perfect and I am surely not judging anyone. I am just sharing from my heart why I'm not going to see this movie that I keep hearing everyone else talk about like it's the best thing since sliced bread. Be a blessing ...

Dandelion ... A wish waiting to happen.

What do you think of when you see a dandelion? When I see a dandelion I think of wishes. When I was little my mom taught me to blow the dandelion seeds and make a wish. Such a simple act, yet it has always stayed with me. Over the years I have shared this tradition with Olivia and to this day when she and I see dandelions we pick them and blow the seeds. I had the joy of babysitting two little girls this past weekend. While playing ball with them I stopped and picked a dandelion. Amazingly and without any instruction the younger girl came right up and blew all the seeds into the wind. It's like the unwritten rule that you blow the seeds from the dandelion. A simple joy from a weed. I can't help but thank the Lord for dandelions. In the midst of the trials I am dealing with He gives me the opportunity to stop and make a wish. To stop stressing and to let go ... When I pray I'd like to equate my stressful situations to those Dandelion seeds flying in the wind ... like the Lord relieving all my struggles. As much as I love the Lord and trust Him, I honestly don't allow myself to give Him all my Dandelion seeds (if you will). I sometimes catch hold of a few and hang on to them. I want to let the Lord take care of that situation for me, but being the control freak that I am I often take my stress back. Yes, I say I am giving it to the Lord, but that's not as easy to do as it is to say. I need to remind myself of the Dandelion seeds floating away. Satan is constantly attacking our family, our child, our finances, our minds, our health, and our world. He is like a roaring lion seeking who he can tear apart. Oh don't get me wrong I know in the end, we win, BUT right now we are on the battlefield. Yes, you are too. We have to arm ourselves with the word of God or we won't be able to stand, must less fight. Satan wants your children. Have you heard or read the lyrics to some 'popular' songs? If you watch TV you see all the filth there. This world is anti-Jesus and people we must get on our knees and cry out to the Lord to protect our children and to rescue us from this junk. We need to make calls, write letters, send emails let our voice be heard to whomever is necessary to make changes to clean up the TV, radio, the world. Don't sit back and think your voice won't make a difference because it will.

Wishes are fun, but prayer is powerful. Join me in praying for our families, our children and our society. Let's pray in the holy and powerful name of Jesus to help each other. Start now, start today.


Go be a blessing ...

Reflections of my life

I bet you didn't know this about me, but I am 42 years old and I've never been on a Ferris Wheel OR flown in a plane. I write out a daily schedule and have multiple calendars for all of our family activities. I like a routine and think it works best for me, HOWEVER, I have days that I wished I could throw it out the window and do something spontaneous. I like long hair and pony tails. My worst flaw is being critical of others. I struggle internally and let the Lord deal with me. I seek Him to restore my mind to thoughts I need to have and not being critical.

When I was in 8th grade I was in homecoming. It was one of my happiest days that turned into my worst nightmare. A drunk man driving an 18 wheeler loaded with batteries ran into the back seat of my mom's Ford Thunderbird while on our way home. We were in a six car pile up and landed on a bridge. We made the front page of the Spartanburg Herald and mom and I had our first ride in an ambulance. No broken bones, but lots of pain and soreness. For weeks I was terrified to ride in a car; I kept hearing all that metal crashing around me.

During my first semester of college at just 18 years old I found a lump in my breast. After failing at draining it with a huge needle the doctor sent me for an ultrasound and a mammogram. I was told I was the youngest person in the area to have a mammogram. None of the tests gave the doctor the information he needed so I had my first ever surgery on Dec. 28, 1988. The doctor did a bilateral mastectomy removing 3 lumps and tissue. I recovered at home. Praise the Lord no cancer was found.

In college I fell in love and had my first big heart break. The Lord sent Chris to pick up the pieces and we're going on 16 happy years. We worked together in his computer business, built a 3000 square foot house on 11 acres, had a baby and then decided to move to a neighborhood. We have been blessed with our one daughter and love her so much, pre-teen years and all :) We embarked on foster parenting last year and have enjoyed caring for 3 precious little girls.

On this life journey I have seen things I wished I hadn't seen, like children suffering and being hungry and neglected. I get frustrated by not having control over situations, but the Lord in His wonderful guidance is teaching me daily to lean on Him and trust Him. I've faced some challenges in my life and had my share of pain and heartache; through it all I've always relied on the Lord. Jesus has been my closest friend and He has never let me down. Please don't start this new Year without Him.

God bless you and your family. Thanks for reading. I hope in the coming year to write more, complain less and be a better servant to the Lord. Oh and just maybe I will overcome my fear and hop a plane or at least a Ferris wheel :) Happy New Year!

My Red Christmas book :)

I want to share with you my red Christmas book. When I was in the 9th grade my favorite English teacher, Mrs. Babb, gave us an assignment to buy a book with empty pages. She wanted us to write about our Christmas experiences from birth to 9th grade. Being the writer that I am I remember being thrilled with that assignment. I have continued to write about each Christmas since then. It was a lot of work in the beginning, but now it is one of my most prized possessions. I not only write about each Christmas and how I celebrated, but I have tucked memorable cards, pictures, church bulletins etc., in my book. So it is a scrap book of Christmas memories. It is not only a joy to write in, but also a joy to read and reflect. Let me encourage you during this very busy season to stop and reflect. We are told from God's word that Mary the mother of Jesus, "pondered these things in her heart". Stop and think about why we celebrate Christmas. What does it mean to you? Write it down. Share the love of Jesus; after all He is reason for the season.

Merry Christmas :)

The World as I see it ...

Newsflash !!! Victoria has NO secret. Glam is all the rage. Falsies are in. If your nose is crooked, surgery can straighten it. If you hips are to big, lypo suction can reduce them. If your smile isn't perfect, porcelain veneers can change them. If your nails don't grow, you can buy acrylic ones. Tummy's can be tucked, wrinkles can be pulled, breast can be enlarged and lifted, buns can be enlarged and lifted, cheeks can be implanted, eyelids can be lifted, ears can be tacked, brown spots can be faded, lips can be puffed up. The list could go on and on, but I think you get the picture. The world wants you to think perfectionism is the way to go, that unless your body is perfect you are worthless. Well I have good news for you, the Bible tells us in Psalms 139:14"that you are fearfully and wonderfully made." God knows the number of hairs on your head. He even knows how many are gray :) After watching TV I have been bombarded with commercials showing half naked women in their panties walking around in high heels. That does not make me want to run out and buy panties, but instead it makes me want to toss my TV in the trash. How in the world did we as a society let things go this far? Why are those vulgar and disgraceful ads on TV? What makes me even sadder is the fact that most people think they are ok. They are quick to say if you don't like them just turn the channel. Those people think I'm a prude. I say I am a mother who wants to protect her child from a false sense of identity. My goal is to teach her the ways of the Lord. I want her to embrace her tallness and inner beauty. I want her to seek the Lord with all of her heart and to know that He created her just the way she is for a reason. I don't want her to compare herself to someone on TV who isn't real. Proper lighting,extreme makeup, and many hair stylist account for those looks. We live in the real world, not their world. 1 John 2:15-17 "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world- the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life- is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever." Wow !! That's where I'm coming from.

If you are mother to a daughter I want to recommend a book I just completed called, 5 Conversations you MUST have with your daughter by Vicki Courtney. It's from LifeWay. I have spent the last several weeks in Bible study at church with many other moms going through this study. It's a must read in our world today.

Go be a blessing and encourage your daughter to be one as well ...

Reflections

Lately I've been pondering church and why we do things the way we do them. For instance church is so different these days. You can attend a traditional service where most people dress in their "Sunday best" and go to Sunday school followed by preaching. You can attend a more contemporary church where people don't dress up and they drink coffee and have refreshments. You can attend a church that offers contemporary and/or traditional worship depending on the time you come. You can attend church in a school gym, a remodeled mall, a metal building or a traditional church building complete with stained glass windows and a sanctuary. Once you get to the church you may see people in all types of clothing and shoes. Those same people will have their Bibles, but the versions will vary as much as the people. There's the King James version, the New King James Version, the New International Version ... and the list goes on. Most churches not only have an organ, but now have drums, trumpets, well ... a full orchestra. Some churches still have a choir and choir robes. The main thing the church needs is to invite the Holy Spirit to join in the midst of those attending. The church needs to have a man of god who preaches from the word of God. The church needs sinners who want to be saved by Jesus' blood. What does church mean to you?

When I was a little girl mom made sure me and my brothers put on our Sunday best and we went to Tucapau Baptist church. We sat on the 3rd pew from the back, left side of the church. I absolutely loved looking out of the beautiful stained glass windows. Each window had someones name of dedication. We sang hymns and actually held the hymnal ( sharing the hymnal with my mother was something precious). We knew everyone around us and made sure to greet any visitors. We read out of the King James Version of the Bible and I'm sure we all had the same version. It was where I prayed and asked Jesus into my heart and where I was baptized. I lived next to Startex Mill and on Sunday the mill was shut down. That meant peace and quiet; no noise of the looms running or people talking or traffic in the parking lot. Sunday was a special day, set apart. It was a day of worship, respect and reverence. I wonder if it will ever be that way again? Sadly, I believe that time in our history is gone ... I miss it. I wish my daughter could have experienced a Sunday like I did.

Reflecting ...

Mountains and Valley's

Have you ever been to the top of a mountain? Isn't it neat how clear and far you can see? Unfortunately though mountain tops are for picnics and hiking ventures. Once you've been there for a while you return to the valley. Life is a lot like mountain tops and valley's. Where ever you may find yourself as you read this, know this, God is with you where ever you are even when you don't "feel" Him. I posted a very personal blog a week or so back about my daughter's first days back to school and anxiety. I have sense deleted that blog, not for any reason other than the fact that is was personal and I feel like those who needed to read it, read it. I will move on from this point and just praise the Lord for His goodness in mountain times and valley times.

I am saved by the blood of the lamb, Jesus Christ. I know He loves me unconditionally. I am not perfect, just forgiven. I make mistakes and sometimes learn from them. Sometimes I make the same ones over and over and wonder if I'll ever learn. No matter, being a child of the one and only King is enough for me. If you find that life is difficult and your struggles seem to much to bear, remember Jesus gave His life for you. That is the ultimate gift... a FREE gift that you accept. You don't WORK for it, you just accept it. Jesus tells us in Revelation 3:20
New King James Version (NKJV)

20 "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me." What ya waiting on?


If you need more information or if you are unsure about this message me and let's look at God's word and get it cleared up for you.

God Bless You.

My daughter, who I love so much, did great last week in school. I give God all praise for releasing her of the anxiety; she is like a new kid. Over the weekend she helped her dad collect food for "Food From the Heart", food drive our church held. She was in and out of a motorcycle trailer (pictured above) loading and unloading bags of food. When she got home she said her ear was hurting and from her voice I knew her sinuses were draining. Well, unfortunately we had to go to the doctor yet again on Monday. She was given a shot and an antibiotic for her sinus/upper respiratory infection. Again she had to miss school, thus more make-up work. I am praising the Lord today that she has been in class the past 3 days and seems to be much better. Today is her last day to take the Z-pak and hopefully after a long weekend she will be on track with all of her classmates next week. I don't expect any special treatment from her teachers, but if you'll pray for them to at least be understanding of the fact that we didn't choose these sicknesses ... they have come on her and we just have to deal with them. After homeschooling for the past two years and not having to be accountable to anyone (other than 2 yearly letters) I can say it is a little stressful for me. Continue to pray for our family and this adjustment. She may be their 7th grader, but she will always be my little girl :-)

From the heart of a momma.

2 Corinthians 12:9 "And He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength I made perfect in weakness.' Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."